


young, dumb, and you're not helping

by novakid



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: (Gary voice) Is this flirting?, Alternate Universe - College/University, Halloween Party Meet cute, M/M, References to Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 11:49:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17724629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novakid/pseuds/novakid
Summary: Getting kicked out of the first party you've ever been invited to is worth it if you get to hear John Constantine laugh afterwards.





	young, dumb, and you're not helping

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. just finished binging legend's of tomorrow. it's good. i got this idea for constangreen college au. i might make more fics in this AU  
> 2\. gary's POV, so sorry if everything is So Much. he's a disaster.  
> 4\. i beta'd this myself, but if there are any spelling/grammar mistakes, my bad!

As far as parties go, Sara Lance’s Legendary Halloween costume party is absolutely… well. Legendary.

Which is to say: It’s the only party Gary Green has ever been invited to, and the fact that he’s surrounded by people who don’t want to shove his head in a toilet is amazing. And while technically Sara didn’t directly invite him, overhearing Nate plan his matching costume with Ray and asking Nate to invite him was probably the next best thing. Essentially the same, really.

The best part is, he actually knows the people attending. Sara Lance’s dorm mates; Nate, Ray, Zari, Amaya, Mick. More of their extended friend group are around, and considering that Gary is BASICALLY a social butterfly, God of Charm and Wit, and an overall likable and friendly person… he has no doubt in his mind that they’ll adore him just as much as Sara and her entourage love him.

And even if that’s not the case, he isn’t worried. Because his BFFUTEOF (Best Friend Forever Until the End of Time) Ava Sharpe is there for him. Not specifically by his side, per se, because the wonderful Ava Sharpe is dating the beautiful Sara Lance and she’s spending most of her party time with her, and totally didn’t leave Gary alone in the kitchen to look for Sara, because psshawww, why would she do that when they’re such close friends? She’s just excited and totally in love, which is also the reason why she forgot to mention the Halloween party to Gary in the first place.

Anyway.

It’s been two hours and Gary is still standing in the kitchen, holding a beer in a red solo cup, wearing his handmade warlock garb that he wore to his last renn faire. Technically it’s been an hour and forty three minutes, but hey, who’s counting?

...Anyway.

Gary is fine where he is. Leaning against the kitchen counter and snacking on the homemade pumpkin spiced cookies in the shape of pumpkins. The kitchen feeds into the living room, where they’re playing various comedy horror movies. Gary is explaining the genius behind the Cornetto trilogy and Edgar Wright’s directing to a man named Leonard who seems to be rushing to finish mixing a cocktail for him and his friend when the party goes nearly silent after a commotion in the dining room.

Leonard’s eyes widen slightly when he hears the low and angry grumbles of one Mick Rory. He gaze drifts onto Gary, and he smiles like he’s taking an opportunity. “Do me a favour and hold these drinks.” He places them into Gary’s hands and pushes past onlookers to get to the other room. Not knowing what to do with the drinks (besides hold them and presumably keep from drinking them) and wanting to see what’s going on, Gary follows.

When he catches up, he sees Leonard in between two men in midst of an argument of sorts: arms separating Mick and… Someone else.

Someone that Gary Green can say with certainty that he’s never seen around before. He can say with certainty because Gary Green would sure as fucking hell remember a man who looked like _that._

Hair bleached blonde and quaffed ever so elegantly, chiseled chin faintly dusted with stubble, and a vulpine smile with a cigarette between his lips, looking like he’s got all the confidence in the world. Unlike everyone else, he’s not in costume. Or at least, he doesn’t think he’s in costume; just a plain white dress shirt and a half tied red necktie. Unless this guy just so happens to be dressed up as Shaun from the very movie Gary was interrupted from.

He’s tall. Not as tall as Mick, but Mick’s size and height looks like it’s not intimidating the handsome stranger at all. Not even as he’s being threatened.

“This slippery weasel... _scammed me,_ Snart _._ ” Mick growls out, which isn’t saying too much because in Gary’s opinion, everything Mick says sounds like a growl and--

His mind stops mid-thought when he hears his voice.

“I din’ scam nobody. Ask anybody here.” The man speaks low and fast, and smooth like butter, and in _British_. “You come to me with a wad of cash askin’ to get your fortune told.” As he says this, he’s shuffling a deck of (tarot?) cards in his hands (oh my god?) with an unfaltering, winning smile. “It’s hardly my fault you didn’t like your future. Maybe you should work on that. Don’t shoot the messenger, am I right, lad?”

Mick growls again, wordlessly this time. He looks just about ready to tear the man’s grin right off of his pretty (very pretty) face when Leonard places a firm hand on his chest and pushes him back. “Now, now. Let’s not get hasty, Mick.” Leonard pronounces every word precisely, making a point to be clear and stern. His gaze falls on the stranger. “So.” He offers a smile. “How much did you scam him for, and when are you going to stop being ‘funny’,” he rolls his eyes,  “and give him back his money?”

“Twenty bucks. And as soon as he stops being so damn easy to scam, I reckon. Or-- when you give me your name and leave this party with me. Whattdya say, sweetheart?” He winks, and Gary can only guess that his charm didn’t work on Leonard because all its power got to Gary and made _his_ knees weak.

Leonard purses his lips and shakes his head. “I’ll have to take a pass on that.”

“Understandable. I think I heard somewhere that lil doggies,” the man gestures toward Mick, “still need their owners to tuck them into bed when they’re still wee pups.”

That seems to be the final straw, because Mick pushes Leonard out of the way and grabs the man’s tie. “I’m gonna punch your face in so deep, it’ll come out the other side.”

Leonard makes no attempt to stop Mick, and it really looks like he’s going to punch the guy’s face in. But Sara’s voice dominates the room, in that way it does, and everyone looks at her. She’s in a zombie cheerleader uniform, which makes Ava’s oddly intricate undead football player uniform makes sense. “What the hell did I say about picking fights during the party? Mick?”

“You said not to. And I say: I don’t care.” Mick doesn’t let go of the man, but he doesn’t look like he’s about to punch him anymore either.

“Constantine.” She says, exasperated and on her last nerve. “Give Mick back his money.” She pauses. “And while you’re at it, stop smoking in our damn dorm.”

The stranger, Constantine, puts his hands up in defeat. He lets out a soft sigh and grins at Mick like he’s an old friend. “If you insist.” He reaches out, as if to pull out Mick’s twenty from his ear, and...

Twenty gold dollar **_coins_ **scatter on the hardwood floor. The whole room stares down at the mess, dumbfounded.

Constantine leaves the room.

* * *

So, that happened.

And Gary is still in awe.

Leonard returns to Gary for his cocktails. He takes them and is about to walk away without saying so much as a thanks, which is fine and all, but Gary stops him before he can leave. “Who was that? I’ve never seen him before. Is he a friend of your friends?”

And Leonard breathes out slowly, almost like a sigh, and pivots on his heel to face Gary. “John Constantine. He’s not anyone’s friend, not that I’m aware of… Maybe with that other British punk, but I doubt it, and Sara, who invited him.” There is a pause as Gary waits for more. Anything else. Leonard just shakes his and turns away. “I don’t know the damn details, go ask her.”

And so he does.

“John Constantine?” She says, after Gary finds her and Ava hiding in the laundry room alone, which is odd since there’s a party going on right outside the hall. Sara’s eyebrows knit together. “Why? What about him?”

“Gary.” Ava, standing up straight with her arms crossed, looking sternly at Gary. Suddenly, he feels like his mom is scolding him for something he’s not aware he’s done. “Just because Constantine can do fancy party tricks for money, doesn’t mean he wants to join your magical dragon group.”

“You mean my dungeons and--”

“Yes, she means that.” Sara says quickly and desperately, probably trying to get to the point and definitely not because of any other reason regarding Gary’s interests. “There’s really not much to say, I don’t…”

“There’s _nothing_ to say.” Ava says. Almost defensively. Suspiciously.

Gary’s gaze bounces back and forth between them as the two ladies look at each other. “Well, I just figured I’d ask… Uh-”

Sara grins and it’s weird the way she’s grinning, and Gary can’t put his finger on it, “He’s just a friend.”

“Barely a friend.”

“I don’t really know him that well--”

“I’d be surprised if anyone knew him at all.”

“We hang out sometimes.”

“And just that. Just. Hanging out.”

They’re both looking at each other, having some silent conversation while Gary is just standing there, waiting. He coughs into his embroidered sleeve. “So… What’s he majoring in?”

Sara smiles and shakes her head, looking at Gary now. “Gonna be honest with you? S’mystery. I have no idea what he’s majoring in. I don’t know where he lives, I’ve never seen him in any classes. He doesn’t have a phone, he just shows up places. I’ve seen him with a lot of people, but I don’t know if he has any close friends.”

“I’m convinced he’s only here to sleep around and cause havoc.” Ava says.

“If I didn’t know any better.” Gary smiles, like he’s catching on. “I’d say you don’t like him very much.”

“It’s a good thing you don’t, then.” Ava is deadpan, and her eyes narrow at him.

He swallows and nods. “Right. Well,” And he looks at Sara, who’s starting to look nervous. “If he doesn’t really make friends, how did you and him--” And the realization hits him like a freight train. Gary gasps audibly and points a finger at Sara. “YOU!” And then points at the direction the almost-fight took place. “AND HIM?”

“SHH!” Both Sara and Ava make the move to try to cover Gary’s mouth and keep attention off of them. “Will you shut up, Gary? I don’t want everyone knowing about my damn sex life.” Sara gets a look from Ava. “Especially old news. It was one night a long time ago. Drop it.”

“Oh, yeah, I get that!” Gary nods and smiles. And without thinking, he says, “So, was he really good? He looks like he’d be really good.”

* * *

Gary gets kicked out from the party.

Which is fine! At this point, Gary has had enough drinks and loud music for one night.

He stumbles out across the lawn of the dorm until he gets to the sidewalk. His car is back at his apartment; Ava drove him here, and Ava is definitely staying with Sara for the night. Gary contemplates an uber, but he didn’t bring his wallet over the excitement of picking out which props to bring with him to the party (Ava convinced him not to bring any, but he forgot his wallet anyway). He finally decides to walk home before he notices smoke blowing from his left. He turns to see, and stiffens when he sees Constantine. He’s sitting at the bus stop, smoking and looking up at the dark night sky.

And Gary’s frozen. He knows he asked Leonard and Sara about him, but now that he’s within shouting distance, Gary can’t recall why he wanted to know more about John Constantine. Definitely to talk to him, because duh, of course he’d want to talk to him. Who wouldn’t? But now…

Okay, he’ll admit one thing quietly to himself. All the times he’s claimed to be great with people was a lie. Sure, Gary’s friendly and has read plenty of “How to make friends” books, but he can’t shake the feeling that people find him a little annoying, or mistake him for a punching bag. And while it’s easy for him to socialize at events with fellow dungeoneers at cons and fairs, he hasn’t actually flirted before. At all. For real.

Gary realizes he’s been standing in the same spot for about five minutes. He should probably turn away and walk home and avoid an oncoming disaster that is him talking to anyone at all, ever, but he’s not so lucky.

“Oi, squire! Art thou high as a bleedin’ kite, or what?” Constantine calls out from the bench he’s sitting at.

“No.” Gary says, letting his mouth run off without permission. “Just drunk.”

“Ahhhh.” He nods and gestures with his hand for Gary to come closer. And he does, sitting down next to Constantine, despite the smoke smell irritating his everything. “You were at the party. Nice get up. What are you? A…”

“A mystical warlock. He’s this character I’ve been working on. I’ve played as him before, but that was before he was really developed, you know? And that was back when I originally made him a bard before I realized I can’t sing-- Not that you normally have to sing when you play as a bard, but I think it’s more fun when you really get into character and LARP. It enhances the story overall, and it’s a hell of a lot of fun. Plus, it’s great improv training.”

Constantine doesn’t say anything for awhile. And Gary starts to grow concerned, because that’s usually never a good sign. But then Constantine starts to laugh and he doesn’t feel humiliated or embarrassed. That, right there, was worth getting kicked out of the party. “You’re an odd bloke, ain’t ya? You do magic, then?”

“Yeah, I do magic! I’m not super big in the tournament stuff, I mostly like it for the art and the lore. Not that I don’t know how to play myself! A lot of my IRL friends aren’t into it, but I’ve been able to pull off some MtG games online through discord--”

“Huh?” Constantine stares at him. Blows a small puff of smoke right into Gary’s face. “What are you going on about, luv?”

“M-Magic the Gathering?” Another short, silent stare down.

“You sure you’re not smokin’ nothin’?”

“No. Yes. You’re real, right?”

That manages to take Constantine aback. Gary is afraid he’s taken it to far, said something too weird, god he doesn’t even know what he’s saying. This is why he shouldn’t drink in public! It’s a shame he can’t beat himself up more for this without looking even more like a big dummy. Or, uh, looking like he’s just staring at Constantine.

“Excuse you?”

“You’re, uh, excused.” Two for two. Constantine is speechless once again. This time, he’s grinning. Which is a good sign, probably. Gary takes this opportunity and goes right for the jugular. “Well, it’s just crazy, right? I see you at this party, and I’ve never seen you before, and it’s absolutely insane, and you’re really handsome and sexy, and you read people’s fortunes and you do magic tricks-- That thing you did with the coins? That was crazy.” He licks his lips and tugs at his sleeves as he rambles on, focusing on the embroidery. “And you’re this mysterious guy that people only kind of know, or have sorta heard of, and you come out of nowhere and I don’t believe in fate, I mean I sort of do with some things but it sort of depends on the circumstances, like I don’t believe people have a predetermined destiny set out in front of them but I think things happen for a reason, and like, so you do that cool stuff, and I come to this party as a warlock, and it’s like, wow Gary, can a guy even BE more your type, or what?”

John Constantine’s eyebrows are high on his forehead, as if he’s processing the ramble that Gary just spit all over the conversation. All he can seem to say is, “Gary, was it? You’re quite the. Charmer.”

And Gary is smiling, open mouthed and excitable. “Charmer? Yeah. I can charm. I charm sometimes. I can charm whenever.”

Constantine smiles too. They’re both smiling, and that’s as high as Gary has ever felt, aside from the time he got his wisdom teeth taken out.

“You certainly can.”

“I certainly can! Will, even! I could. If you. Wanted to. I mean.” Gary looks up and bites his lip. “Whenever. Whenever you’re… I mean, you don’t have a phone--”

“Don’t need one. I vaguely know where I’m needed.” He winks. (fuck!)

“Oh god, please.” And a pause. “Did I say that out loud?”

That sends Constantine chuckling, like he just heard the funniest joke. He slaps a hand on Gary’s back, solid and warm, and this is the best night of his life. “You’re a bloody card, squire!”

“I’m a card. I can be a card, like those cards you have. The big ones that you shuffle, like a shuffling card. Cards. Like that thing you did.”

Constantine’s hand finds its way around to Gary’s shoulder. He’s grinning and leaning his head in close, laughing and squeezing his shoulder. “Aren’t you a cute one? What are you trying to ask me?”

“I-- Oh. Ask you?”

“Aye.” He stops laughing now, but the grin is ever present on his face. “I can only assume, what with the flattery and all, you’re itchin’ to ask me somethin’.” He tilts his head to the side slightly, with something playful laced into his voice.

Gary swallows thickly on nothing. He can see Constantine watch his Adam's apple.

He makes him feel so bold.

“So, go ahead. I’m all ears, luv.”

Gary nods and licks his lips, trying to find the words. Trying to find the gall, the power within himself, the courage to have a coherent thought and _say it._

And then he does.

“Do you want to join my Dungeons and Dragons campaign?”


End file.
